Kalahari Herald Chronicles 31 January 2017 3#22

DAILY NEWS FROM MAMLAKAT KALAHARI    31 January 2017  3#22

(http://mykalahariblogaddress.blogspot.com)

((see dara's video of Queen Vi's party  https://youtu.be/EtOflO7KktA))

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NOTE THE CHANGE IN DATE!

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SHEIK IBN BEN YUSUF AND NOURA ANNOUNCE THEIR WEDDING!

NUPTIALS TO BE CELEBRATED ON WEDNESDAY, 15 FEBRUARY 2017

12 NOON SLT, IN NEW KALAHARI

PRESIDING: KING HASSAN IBN TRRROL

"TRADITIONAL MUSLIM WEDDING"

BRIDE WEARS RED, GUESTS SHOULD WEAR OTHER COLORS!

ALL WOMEN INVITED TO THE BATH AND HENNA CEREMONY

IN THE BATH HOUSE AT 11:30 AM SLT

ALL MEN GATHER AT THE TAVERN AT 11:30 AM SLT

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UPCOMING EVENTS

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GRAND OPENING OF THE GARDEN OF 1001 PLEASURES

Wednesday, 12 Noon SLT, 8 February 2017

The Garden of 1001 Pleasures offers great variety of role play and fun. You will meet and enjoy beautiful dancers and slave girls in an oriental, sensual, and erotic atmosphere.

The Garden of 1001 Pleasures will have its Grand Opening on Wednesday 8 February at 12 Noon SLT. Please invite the friends who you think would be interested to join us at the Garden opening at that time.

A separate brochure about the opening will be ready by Thursday 2 February (Inshallah), and Lady Josie North will share that with us all as soon as it is available.

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THE LOST TREASURE OF

SULEIMAN THE MAGNIFICENT

Buried Treasure Rumored in Kalahari Waters

Suleiman the Magnificent ("Kanuni" - the Lawgiver)  is perhaps the greatest Muslim leader of our times, with an Empire stretching across half the known world'

Under his rule, the Ottoman fleet dominates the seas from the Mediterranean to the Red Sea and through the Persian Gulf.

To support his mastery, Suleiman’s ships carried huge treasures from one end of his Empire. For many years, rumors have circulated that a certain Royal Ship from Istanbul had been attacked and taken by a gang of notorious pirates. The only facts known are that the treasure ship never made port, and nothing was ever again heard of the treasure or its location. 

New reports are now circulating among those in the know in Kalahari, (Palace Slave Nada perhaps??) who have heard that large quantities of loot and treasured items from the ship have now been discovered, scattered around the sea bed of Kalahari, near the Mermaid Cove.

Among those items, there is a special bear rug that the one and only Princess of Kingdom of Istanbul treasured above all her possessions, as well as enormous quantities of gold coins known as sultani.

The Princess decreed that anyone who can find the bear rug, and the sultanis, and return it to her will be rewarded with 200 gold coins! (Lindens)

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Afraa al Abid

Kalahari Herald

Kalahari Herald Chronicles 25 January 2017 3#21

DAILY NEWS FROM MAMLAKAT KALAHARI    25 January 2017  3#21

(http://mykalahariblogaddress.blogspot.com)

((see dara's video of Queen Vi's party  https://youtu.be/EtOflO7KktA))

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SHEIK IBN BEN YUSUF AND NOURA ANNOUNCE THEIR WEDDING!

NUPTIALS TO BE CELEBRATED ON SUNDAY, 5 FEBRUARY 2017

12 NOON SLT, IN NEW KALAHARI

PRESIDING: KING HASSAN IBN TRRROL

"TRADITIONAL MUSLIM WEDDING"

BRIDE WEARS RED, GUESTS SHOULD WEAR OTHER COLORS!

ALL WOMEN INVITED TO THE BATH AND HENNA CEREMONY

IN THE BATH HOUSE AT 11:30 AM SLT

ALL MEN GATHER AT THE TAVERN AT 11:30 AM SLT

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Afraa al Abid

Kalahari Herald

Kalahari Herald Chronicles 22 January 2017 3#20

DAILY NEWS FROM MAMLAKAT KALAHARI    22 January 2017  3#20

(http://mykalahariblogaddress.blogspot.com)

((see dara's video of Queen Vi's party  https://youtu.be/EtOflO7KktA))

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KING VISITS THE UNDER-CONSTRUCTION WELCOME CENTRE!
KING AND JOSIE NAME IT "THE GARDEN OF 1001 PLEASURES"
MONARCH APPROVES INSTALLATION OF ROYAL SHIBARI ROOM!
JOSIE NORTH AND HER GIRLS WELCOME THE ROYAL COUPLE!
DEPLORABLE SHEIK INSULTS BEAUTIFUL MINISTER AFRAA!
EVENTS: OFFICIAL OPENING OF THE GARDEN OF 1001 PLEASURES,
SHEIK AND NOURA WEDDING, ROYAL HUNT AT MAYA LAND, 
BRANDING OF SLAVE JULIE BRIGHT AND TRADITIONAL CHANGES!

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THE GARDEN OF 1001 PLEASURES

Under the inspired leadership of Lady Josie North, the Welcome Centre, now officially named as "The Garden of 1001 Pleasures," takes shape before our eyes.

Palace Slave Nada assisted Josie in constructing this pleasure dome which the King did decree.

Recruiting coordinator Eman has been invaluable in assisting Josie in her search for the most elegant, sophisticated, and beautiful girls for the Gardens,

But it is Josie's outstanding work which has brought the Brothel building to completion, and almost all the elements for a successful operation to be put in place. Lady Josie plans each move carefully with her team

has recruited outstanding girls whom she controls thoroughly

and presents beautifully

girl barb

girl Aisha with Coordinator Eman

girl Nilasso

And we are told that more lovely and elegant Pleasure Girls are in the process of testing to see if they meet the high standards demanded by Lady Josie. We close with a picture of the Queen and Lady Josie welcoming Sir Emanuel, as he brings the girl Aisha to enter our service.

THE ROYAL SHIBARI ROOM

The Garden of 1001 Pleasures is a place where dreams come true. While this has generally been a Palace Secret, it can now be revealed that King Hassan is a devotee of the ancient Japanese artistic form of rope bondage known as Shibari. Much as his love for the Belly Dance, and his demand that all women in Kalahari, both slave and free, become expert in that ancient art, there is no doubt that the King dreams of a similar "fate" for putting all the women of Kalahari in ropes. (ahahahaha)

In an unprecedented, even "magical" revelation, the Chronicles has utilized the services of fortune tellers, soothsayers, prophets, and a bottle of pirate rum that Minister Afraa hid in the dinghy which brought her back from her kidnap ordeal, actually to READ THE KING'S THOUGHTS! Further, the greatest artists of Kalahari were employed to transform these thoughts into visual revelations!
Here are the results:

The King dreams of putting Palace Slave Nada Syuhada into rope bondage:

(You can tell it is a dream because Nada is all blurry. ahahaha)

Now, Nada reads the King's dreams of putting Dancer Girl Nilasso on the rack

And finally, the King's imagination runs wild as he dreams of putting the King dreams about putting
Queen Vi, Roberta Honey, Afraa al Abid, Aisha, Nilasso, Eman, and Josie North,
on the Shibari Rack. (What an imagination that man has!)

The Grand Opening date will soon be announced, but all are encouraged to start dreaming!

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MEDIEVAL MURMURS

In an scurrilous letter addressed to the Kalahari community, Sheik Ibn Ben Yusuf libeled the lovely and innocent Minister Afraa al Abid, seeming not to care about the outrageous abuse and terrifying ordeal she so recently experienced. In the interest of balanced reporting, the Chronicles will publish this disgusting drivel, just to show that freedom of expression flourishes in Kalahari.

In other news, Minister Afraa is well along in her planning of the wedding of the beautiful and kind Noura, and the #!?@ Sheik Ibn Ben Yusuf.

But here is that dastardly letter to our poor abused Minister:

from the prosperous, well-fed, and comfortable Sheik:

An Open Letter to the Good People of Kalahari from Sheik Ibn Ben Yusuf

Your Royal Highness and Citizens of Kalahari

A Series of Observances on that self-indulgent "Minister" Afraa al Abid.

Women of Kalahari stop your foolish female fluttering and vapid simpering around this STUPID woman: she has no one but herself to blame for her predicament.

A supposed Minister who considers herself the equal of men, but does not have the brains of a GNAT! So stupid that she walks, half naked, around a dock at night and is surprised when she is captured by pirates!! They probably only wanted some coffee cream pies from the tavern and instead got a so-called Minister. I wonder if, at first, they assumed that they had captured the sort of woman who usually walks, half naked, around the docks at night???

Then she whines on about being beaten and tortured, who did she think had captured her? Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs???

And we the citizens are supposed to feel sorry for her???

This would never have happened if she was in her PROPER place. At HOME, in the KITCHEN or BEDROOM, looking after her husband or guardian. Now she SAYS she has a husband, but he is never seen, and in truth, if it is the man I think he is, he would have forgotten her two minutes after he set eyes on his next concubine.

Worst of all good Kalahari citizens were put at risk by this silly woman. Jon1Styker risked his life in a nest of vipers for her and Talena Kirax, who is a brave and fearless warrior (for a woman), stood face to face with them on the dock and could have been killed if anything went wrong.

But worst of all the TREASURY of this great nation has been GUTTED to pay the ransom of this blubbering bonehead, money that could have been spent on the poor and needy, or on troops to defend us. Because now that the PIRATES HAVE SEEN HOW WEAK WE ARE, mark my words, THEY WILL BE BACK!!!! God alone knows what state we would be in if they had got the coffee cream pies as well.

NOW NO ONE IS SAFE BECAUSE OF THE SELFISH STUPIDITY OF THIS EXAMPLE OF WOMANHOOD.

In our perfectly fair and balanced reporting, we will not mention his implied insult to the King for appointing Afraa; the dismissal of the fabled warrior Talena Kirax as good ("for a woman" !!!!!!); to degrading all women by stating they are guilty of foolish female fluttering and vapid simpering, and are good only for use in the bedroom or the kitchen; or even the bitter assault on Afraa, as brutal as that of the pirates who kidnapped her.

But Afraa, always generous and kind, gave us this statement:

"Despite the vicious assault by this unscrupulous trader and abuser of women Sheik Ibn Ben Yusuf, I urge all Kalaharians to treat him well, as all here, no matter how despicable, are under the benevolent leadership of the Royal Couple, and have the right to express their opinions freely.

So, do not throw rotten tomatoes at him, or boiling cups of tea, Also, I urge you not to lure his wives away from him, do not spit in his drinks before serving him in the Tavern, or step on him while he is seated at a Tavern table."

Thus ends our fair and balanced reporting. ahahaha

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UPCOMING EVENTS

WEDDING OF BEAUTIFUL NOURA AND @#%$! SHEIK IBN BEN YUSUF

Sheik Idn Ben Yusuf, his lovely fiance Noura and Minister Afraa al Abid

OFFICIAL OPENING OF "THE GARDEN OF 1001 PLEASURES"

The Garden of 1001 Pleasures managed by Lady Josie North

THE BRANDING OF PALACE SLAVE JULIE BRIGHT

King brands Palace Slave dara

THE ROYAL HUNT: KALAHARI VISITS THE LOST JUNGLE OF THE MAYA

Minister Afraa and the Leader of the Lost Jungle of the Maya--Lexia Moonstone

TRADITIONAL CHANGES COMING TO KALAHARI?

The King and Queen have been seen in close contact recently (No, not just THAT, you perverts!) and it is clear that a more traditional Kalahari may be in the future. The expert investigative unit of the Chronicles also has learned that a new and greater Palace is being discussed.
Keep reading the Chronicles for all the latest news and gossip.!

King Hassan ibn Trrrol and Queen Vi Almasa Trrrol

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Afraa al Abid

Kalahari Herald

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Kalahari Herald Chronicles 17 January 2017 3#19

DAILY NEWS FROM MAMLAKAT KALAHARI    17 January 2017  3#19

(http://mykalahariblogaddress.blogspot.com)

((and see dara's video!  https://youtu.be/EtOflO7KktA))

BREAKING NEWS!!!

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MINISTER AFRAA AL ABID RETURNED SAFELY!
KING SUCCESSFULLY NEGOTIATES WITH ELENA DA MORNAY!
KING PRIVATELY CONFERS WITH TALENA KIRAX
QUEEN AND PALACE SLAVES DARA AND NADA LEAD WELCOME!
DOCTER ALBERT USHIMAWA SLEEPS AS THE KING IS SPEAKING!

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Finally, the wandering Minister, kidnapped, abused, distressed, and finally ransomed, came home. Met by an enthusiastic crowd, and the Monarch who paid, yes, a "King's Ransom," Afraa al Abid staggered from the dinghy onto the hallowed ground of Kalahari.

Here is how the day unfolded.

The cowardly pirates who took her were wise enough to realize that if they appeared in Kalahari with the beaten Minister, the enraged crowd would lynch them, crucify them, even make them listen to one of the King's long-winded stories!

Shrewdly, the pirates chose a third party, Elena da Mornay, to bring Afraa to Kalahari without incident. The hooded Minister was brought to a deserted tropical beach, briefly unhooded to prove her identity to Elena, then was hooded again for her voyage to Kalahari.

The journey was surprisingly short, which surprised the Minister, as she did not realize pirates operated with impunity so close to Kalahari. But almost before she knew it, Afraa's long ordeal had ended with a brief sea voyage, and a return HOME!

The onlookers who had been anxiously awaiting news, shuffled nervously

but then Afraa staggered ashore,

and the huge crowd was horrified to see the bruised face and battered body of the once lively Minister.

At first, everyone stood still in shock as Afraa painfully walked off the small dinghy which had carried her to the Kingdom, and the King negotiated a hard bargain with the pirate's negotiator Elena da Mornay.

Josie North broke the frozen tableau by hugging Afraa closely, as she returned, safe, and somewhat sound, to Kalahari.

At the same time, the King and Queen showed the Negotiator the ransom that had been gathered

and the King masterfully directed slave Amy Damster to obey her new owners, as evil as they might be

after having displayed her carefully, insuring that the pirates would be dazzled by the pile of gold and the human treasure of Amy, so that they would completely forget the absence of the ten coffee cream pies that had been promised!

As da Mornay rowed away from shore with the ransom riches in the dinghy.

Afraa was greeted properly by Queen Vi Almasa Trrrol, along with Sheik Dakhil Ben Yusuf, Josie, and slave Abu

and the merciful Kalahari folk clothed Afraa,

at which time Palace Slave Nada slipped her some medicine (cannabis oil, if you must know, (who wouldn't have such a drug if they lived in the Pal err in a warm show of care?) fed her,

and took her to the Clinic.

As Afraa was being cared for, the King summoned some of the wisest of the Kingdom to talk about the kidnap, and plot revenge against the pirates

the King began a very detailed speech about harbor defenses, wind and tide equations, some of his own heroic military feats when he was younger, (OK much younger), and as the Queen, Josie, slaves Nada, Nilasso and erinn, listened with rapt attention,

Dr. Albert took the opportunity to catch up on some much needed sleep, surely because he agreed with everything the King was saying that he must have heard frequently before. It most certainly could not have been the King's rather wordy speech, the warm tropical breezes coming in from the sea, and the large quantity of delicious food served by Tavern Manager Roberta Honey.

At the Clinic, Palace Slave dara took charge of her patient, while faithful Abu stood by with bolt cutters used at the Mine, so that he could remove the insulting collar and cuffs the vicious pirates had forced on Afraa as part of their psychological torture.

The majestic and caring Queen and the drug-dealing Palace Slave Nada (ahahaha) stood by to offer any assistance needed.

Finally, after one final visit from slave Nilasso

and some pressing questions from the noted Investigator Talena Kirax, and Brothel Manager Josie North, the Minister was allowed to rest.

After Afraa had fallen into a pained sleep, a disguised Talena shared her observations with the King, and was commissioned by him to track down these pirate scum, and make sure they never trouble Kalaharians again.

And so a painful chapter in the history of Kalahari is closed, with the safe return of the Queen, and Minister Afraa, and the Lion of the Desert King Hassan, has turned our winter of discontent into a glorious summer of our Son of Yak! (ahahahaha)

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MEDIEVAL MURMURS

The King and Queen have announced that Palace Slave dara has been appointed Kahya: Leader of the Harem. All Kalaharians salute the beautiful and talented dara, as she takes up this important post.

And in news which has caused a thrill of excitement to course through the veins of every male Kalaharian, and not a few females (ahahaha), the King announces that a Royal Brothel err I mean "Welcome Centre," is nearing completion, and will soon be open for business, err that is to say, the business of welcoming. The Centre will be located in New Kalahari, near the Kingbe Palace, the waterfall, and the surging sea, which should allow the workers at the Centre ample opportunity to please their clients in a variety of ways.

The talented citizen Josie North has been announced as Manager of the Brothel

and she has been superbly assisted by the beautiful and talented Palace Slave Nada Syuhada, whose previous building designs are legendary.

The King must be overjoyed, with two talented Palace Slaves like Nada and dara doing such important work, with the return of the elegant Queen to manage domestic and Palace Affairs, and the safe homecoming of Minister for External Relations Afraa al Abid, the King will have a great deal of time to pursue his various hobbies, such as studying "art" portraits, collecting lovely flowers of the Kingdom, and teaching massage therapy to all who qualify to be massaged. (wink wink)

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UPCOMING EVENTS

The wedding of Sheik Dakhil Ben Yusuf and the lovely Noura has set Kalahari abuzz. All wait with bated breath to hear what date the prominent landowner, and military expert, will choose for his wedding.

The King did not seem too pleased with Dr. Albert's nap time, and will undoubtedly take time out from his pursuit of important hobbies to have a chat with the handsome and experienced physician.

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Afraa al Abid

Kalahari Herald

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