DAILY NEWS FROM MAMLAKAT KALAHARI 8 February 2018
(http://mykalahariblogaddress.blogspot.com)
KING HASSAN REFUSES TO DIVULGE WHERE HE WILL SEARCH!
ALL KALAHARI WONDERS WHAT SORT OF MAN CAN HANDLE EHLINE?
HER FATHER SAILMASTER THORGRIM IS COUNTING ON A RICH ONE!
Yes, it is true, many people have criticized King Hassan as a foolish monarch, with no ability to dance, who is only interested in chasing beautiful women around Kalahari.
When his supporters counter by saying, Well. look, he married Queen Dara, who is beautiful, talented, elegant and extremely competent, that argument is dismissed with the phrase "Opposites attract!" (ahahaha)
(http://mykalahariblogaddress.blogspot.com)
(and to see past issues, scroll down and on the right hand side,
and you will see the blog archive with all 237 issues!)
((and see dara's video! https://youtu.be/EtOflO7KktA))
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
KING HASSAN SEARCHES!
THE GREAT HUMANITARIAN SEEKS A HUSBAND FOR EHLINE!
DR ALI LAST SEEN FLEEING KALAHARI!
THE LION OF THE DESERT IS ON THE PROWL!
DR ALI LAST SEEN FLEEING KALAHARI!
THE LION OF THE DESERT IS ON THE PROWL!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
KING HASSAN REFUSES TO DIVULGE WHERE HE WILL SEARCH!
ALL KALAHARI WONDERS WHAT SORT OF MAN CAN HANDLE EHLINE?
HER FATHER SAILMASTER THORGRIM IS COUNTING ON A RICH ONE!
Yes, it is true, many people have criticized King Hassan as a foolish monarch, with no ability to dance, who is only interested in chasing beautiful women around Kalahari.
 |
| King "dancing" with numerous beautiful women |
When his supporters counter by saying, Well. look, he married Queen Dara, who is beautiful, talented, elegant and extremely competent, that argument is dismissed with the phrase "Opposites attract!" (ahahaha)
 |
| Beautiful Queen Dara |
But the Kalahari Herald Chronicles tirelessly seeks the truth in all matters (except when "fake news" serves us better hihi!) and so we are here to report the true purpose of the King's lengthy and dangerous journey throughout the known world.
What is it which causes him to take ship across the dangerous seas, filled with monsters and pirates? What will bring him to barren desert outposts, fending off hostile tribesman, wild animals and vicious sandstorms? What might force him to attack impenetrable fortresses, climb towering mountains, stop chasing beautiful women? (OK, nothing will cause the last to happen!)
The truth is, THE KING IS ON A MISSION OF MERCY! He has undertaken a Quest for a Husband for Ehline!
Just consider the difficulties the King has embraced strictly out of compassion. In addition to facing all the dangers mentioned above, the King must find a husband who satisfies the crafty Ehline, AND her greedy father Thorgrim, while finding a man who is not an embarrassment to Kalahari.
In order to assist the King, the lovely and talented staff of the Chronicles (namely Afraa al Abid ahahaha) has chosen some legendary men who might meet the requirements the King must fulfill.
Knowing the greedy nature of Ehline and Thorgrim, perhaps the legendary Croesus, richest man in the world, is still alive somewhere in the fabled Kingdom of Lydia.
Another candidate who might match the ruthless nature of the Father-Daughter team of Thorgrim and Ehline would be Vlad the Impaler, said to have murdered 20,000 of HIS OWN FOLLOWERS, in order to frighten an invading Ottoman army. In addition, Vlad's country of origin is Romania, also the home of Queen Nathalie, so it would further bind Kalahari in its alliance with Nathalie's homeland.
Finally, we have a suggestion that could possibly please King Hassan more than it might please dear Ehline. The fabled northern Kingdom of Albion has been ruled by an increasingly corpulent King (frequently, the best rulers are vary fat, as evidenced by the fabled Emperor Augosto of Iconia.) called Henry VIII.
The appeal that Henry VIII could have for King Hassan is that this monarch has executed at least two of his wives on the flimsiest excuses, and murdered numerous other members of his land. Whether this would have appeal for Ehline is an open question, but she does admire ruthless men!
Now, all Kalahari has been informed of the compassionate nature of our monarch. Let us all offer prayers for the safe return of the
Great Humanitarian, and Lion of the Desert
King Hassan ibn Trrrol!
What is it which causes him to take ship across the dangerous seas, filled with monsters and pirates? What will bring him to barren desert outposts, fending off hostile tribesman, wild animals and vicious sandstorms? What might force him to attack impenetrable fortresses, climb towering mountains, stop chasing beautiful women? (OK, nothing will cause the last to happen!)
 |
| King Hassan attacks a castle seeking a husband for Ehline |
The truth is, THE KING IS ON A MISSION OF MERCY! He has undertaken a Quest for a Husband for Ehline!
Just consider the difficulties the King has embraced strictly out of compassion. In addition to facing all the dangers mentioned above, the King must find a husband who satisfies the crafty Ehline, AND her greedy father Thorgrim, while finding a man who is not an embarrassment to Kalahari.
 |
| Sailmaster Thorgrim already imagining his fortune |
In order to assist the King, the lovely and talented staff of the Chronicles (namely Afraa al Abid ahahaha) has chosen some legendary men who might meet the requirements the King must fulfill.
 |
| Afraa passed out errr diligently working on the Chronicles |
Knowing the greedy nature of Ehline and Thorgrim, perhaps the legendary Croesus, richest man in the world, is still alive somewhere in the fabled Kingdom of Lydia.
 |
| King Croesus of Lydia, richest man in the world. |
Another candidate who might match the ruthless nature of the Father-Daughter team of Thorgrim and Ehline would be Vlad the Impaler, said to have murdered 20,000 of HIS OWN FOLLOWERS, in order to frighten an invading Ottoman army. In addition, Vlad's country of origin is Romania, also the home of Queen Nathalie, so it would further bind Kalahari in its alliance with Nathalie's homeland.
 |
| Vlad the Impaler, Ruthless Ruler of Romania |
Finally, we have a suggestion that could possibly please King Hassan more than it might please dear Ehline. The fabled northern Kingdom of Albion has been ruled by an increasingly corpulent King (frequently, the best rulers are vary fat, as evidenced by the fabled Emperor Augosto of Iconia.) called Henry VIII.
 |
| The handsome and sexy Emperor Augusto of Iconia |
The appeal that Henry VIII could have for King Hassan is that this monarch has executed at least two of his wives on the flimsiest excuses, and murdered numerous other members of his land. Whether this would have appeal for Ehline is an open question, but she does admire ruthless men!
 |
| Henry VIII of Albion, a pale imitation of Emperor Augusto. |
Now, all Kalahari has been informed of the compassionate nature of our monarch. Let us all offer prayers for the safe return of the
Great Humanitarian, and Lion of the Desert
King Hassan ibn Trrrol!
 |
| King Hassan, the Great Humanitarian |
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Afraa al Abid
Kalahari Herald
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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