DAILY NEWS FROM MAMLAKAT KALAHARI
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MURDER MOST FOUL IN KALAHARI!
SHEIK SULEIMAN EL KEBAB SKEWERED!
BODY DISCOVERED DURING THE ENDLESS KALAHARI RENOVATIONS!
VIGILANT PRISON MANAGER STEPHANIE BROWN CAPTURES SUSPECT!
SHIFTY EYED PRISONER MIAA CERISE INTERROGATED!
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| Body of Sheik Suleiman el Kebab |
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The discovery of the body of the prosperous and well-liked merchant Sheik Suleiman el Kebab triggered an angry reaction among Kalaharians infuriated by his murder. The well-liked Sheik had mysteriously disappeared a few days ago, and his crew searched for him with no success.
Suspicion immediately settled on an unattached woman, Miaa Cerise, who had been offered free passage on the Sheik's last voyage, and had been seen spending large sums of money in various establishments in recent days.
The evildoer was discovered by the vigilant Prison Manager Stephanie Brown taking gold coins from a bag monogrammed with the Sheik's initials. A search revealed a blood-stained dagger, so Stephanie immediately placed Cerise in custody, and escorted her to the dreaded, but newly renovated Kalahari Prison.
Further exploration uncovered the Sheik's body, unceremoniously dropped into one of the numerous renovation ditches that deface the beautiful Kalahari landscape, and a thorough examination revealed that Sheik Suleiman el Kebab had been skewered with a dagger!
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| Minister Afraa al Abid interrogates Prisoner Miaa Cerise |
King Hassan chose Minister Afraa al Abid to interrogate the prisoner in the presence of the King, the Queen, the defense attorney Abla, Manager Stephanie Brown and others.
Fortunately, Minister Afraa had encountered this evildoer some years ago in the Emirate of Kuwar, where Afraa had some minor connection with the authorities, and where similar crimes had been committed. She was able to point out the criminal past of the defendant, who had avoided justice in Kuwar by escaping from the ill-managed prison there.
She also established, after repeated lying denials, that Miaa possessed a dagger, and had actually killed the Sheik, although the shifty-eyed prisoner continued to maintain the murder was in self-defense against the amorous advances of the Sheik. The foolishness of this defense is made clear by the fact that the Sheik's reputation in moral sexual behavior is equal to that of the best men in Kalahari, even the King's!!!
Angered by such outright lies, the King approached the bound prisoner
and jogged her memory with a few well-intentioned slaps to the face. Lady Tina Wo could barely restrain herself from strangling the prisoner, as Tina's fidelity to the highest standards of sexual morality is well known.
Prison Manager Stephanie probably saved the prisoner from an immediate lynching by safely locking her in a Kalahari cell, which is FAR more secure that anything in Kuwar. There she awaits trial on Thursday.
All justice loving folk in Kalahari certainly hope that Defense Attorney Abla will stay within the law as she represents her client, and not resort to the blatant sexual innuendo and promises which past attorneys have used to obtain highly questionable verdicts in Kalahari.
King Hassan ibn Trrrol will preside at the trial.
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Fortunately, Minister Afraa had encountered this evildoer some years ago in the Emirate of Kuwar, where Afraa had some minor connection with the authorities, and where similar crimes had been committed. She was able to point out the criminal past of the defendant, who had avoided justice in Kuwar by escaping from the ill-managed prison there.
She also established, after repeated lying denials, that Miaa possessed a dagger, and had actually killed the Sheik, although the shifty-eyed prisoner continued to maintain the murder was in self-defense against the amorous advances of the Sheik. The foolishness of this defense is made clear by the fact that the Sheik's reputation in moral sexual behavior is equal to that of the best men in Kalahari, even the King's!!!
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| King comes close to prisoner Miaa Cerise |
Angered by such outright lies, the King approached the bound prisoner
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| King disciplines Miaa Cerise |
and jogged her memory with a few well-intentioned slaps to the face. Lady Tina Wo could barely restrain herself from strangling the prisoner, as Tina's fidelity to the highest standards of sexual morality is well known.
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| Lady Tina Wo and prisoner Miaa Cerise |
Prison Manager Stephanie probably saved the prisoner from an immediate lynching by safely locking her in a Kalahari cell, which is FAR more secure that anything in Kuwar. There she awaits trial on Thursday.
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| Miaa Cerise awaits trial in Kalahari Prison |
All justice loving folk in Kalahari certainly hope that Defense Attorney Abla will stay within the law as she represents her client, and not resort to the blatant sexual innuendo and promises which past attorneys have used to obtain highly questionable verdicts in Kalahari.
King Hassan ibn Trrrol will preside at the trial.
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| King Hassan does some of his best work from the bench ahahaha |
TRIAL OF PRISONER MIAA CERISE
THURSDAY, 12 OCTOBER 2017, 12:30 PM SLT
KALAHARI JUSTICE CENTRE
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| Kalahari Justice Centre |
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Afraa al Abid
Kalahari Herald
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